Moonlight Life

tumblr, this is where i leave you.

valenciadreams:

i started this blog just after turning 19. i am now 26 years old. 

this blog has served me well for many, many years. i have had it since i started at my university. i had it during the years between “the incident” with my ex, and me realizing and learning what had happened to me. i had it during all the years i lacked passion because i was repressing my desire to preach and speak. 

last night, i realize that this may be the end of my tumblr life. at least, i think so. i feel that it is time for me to move on. onto what? i don’t know. in the past, i went from xanga (LOL) to blogspot to tumblr. there is no next step for my online blogging world, and yet i know that my time here is done. 

tumblr is where i started to realize that what had happened to me could be called rape. wow.

tumblr is where i began to break down my isolated way of thinking, and learn to listen to those who had stories that did not match my own. tumblr turned me into a listener, which has turned me into a fighter, a social justice warrior if you will.

tumblr was here for me for all my therapy, for my hatred of dogs to my love of dogs to the death of my dog

tumblr was here for me as i came to term with my own identity, from non-binary (it taught me the term!) and bisexual, to a confident stutterer…

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i have had friends on here for years. if you’d like to stay connected, you can add me to the following:

fb: https://www.facebook.com/jaymieh

insta: https://www.instagram.com/jaymie.lh/

twitter: https://twitter.com/jaymie_leanne 

snapchat: @jaymie_allover 

wordpress: https://jaymieallover.com 

msg if you want my cell #.

<3 if you choose not to connect with me outside of tumblr, that’s fine too. send me a message and if i ever log back in, i’ll be sure to hit you up. or also i have emails on for inbox messages.

i have loved our years together. 

“2016 Was Hard” - Scattered Thoughts

“2016 Was Hard” – Scattered Thoughts

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Creatives, Notes, and Journals 2016 was hard. I started the year disillusioned, heartbroken, mourning. I had a pending draft blogged called “24 Joyous Moments of being 24” – a blog in which I celebrated 2015. But 6 days before the end of 2015, my beloved Turbo was hit by a car right in front of me and passed away. Nothing could cheer me up. I received a promotion at work at the same time, but…

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God: Not an Image of Self, but an Image of Teachers

God: Not an Image of Self, but an Image of Teachers

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How I Present Myself Online is a Topic Though… Often when theologians or pastors talk about how people view God and the ways we interact with God, they often focus on the idea that people create gods out of how they see themselves. I’m in the middle of listening to “Pete Rollins on God Part 2” on the The Robcast as I write this. Yet I find this to be a limited understanding of the way a culture…

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Living Life Takes Time (And Yet It Also Doesn’t)

Living Life Takes Time (And Yet It Also Doesn’t)

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Allow yourself the healing process. This was a piece of mine (Dec 2012) That Saturday afternoon at the beach was breezy, but not cold. I didn’t bring a sweater, but I winded up with his. We walked along the pier, looked at dolphins, and I thought “This is it, this is when he’ll ask me.” But he didn’t. So I sent my friends to talk to him. But he kissed me beneath the pier that night, a smug smile…

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What if I’m Wrong About God?

What if I’m Wrong About God?

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How did I wind up so interested in theology? I think the spark may have been lit in high school, as I remember being frustrated the way I’d basically memorize my youth pastor’s sermon points, but couldn’t retain anything in my AP Calculus class. Then perhaps it was further dived into when the boy I had a crush on when I was 18 and 19 years old would talk to me late into the night about C.S. Lewis…

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August Update - Stuff I’m Reading/Listening To

August Update – Stuff I’m Reading/Listening To

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Recently I was reflecting on how much information I’ve been taking in with no real way to share it or process it fully. A friend suggested that I share what I’ve been reading or listening to as way to process it. As I listed what it is I’ve been listening to, my main sources of information seemed to have a theme… it was very white. Which surprised me a little, as I’ve been intentionally following…

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A Spot at the Table (Communion)

A Spot at the Table: The Purpose of Communion

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Communion. Eucharist. The Divine Meal. What does it all mean? Why do churches partake in this every Sunday, or twice a year, or in between church services the first Sunday of the month? Why are there so many arguments about what it means from a theological standpoint? Throughout Christian history, so much has been said on Eucharist and what it means. I grew up Catholic, so Communion was very…

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Anger, Imperfection, and Divine Protection

Anger, Imperfection, and Divine Protection

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I sometimes think I hear this “voice” in my heart that tells me what to do. When it first really started, I knew “for sure” that it was God speaking to me somehow. I called it a “knowing in my heart.” It was a voice clearly outside of my own, because I felt that my own voice was sinful and self-hating. As my faith has been shaping and changing, and as my own personal confidence has grown, I still…

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Why I’m Exhausted by “A Church is not THE Church” and Why I’m Glad I Was Churchless

Why I’m Exhausted by “A Church is not THE Church” and Why I’m Glad I Was Churchless

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Have you ever heard someone be very vulnerable and exposed, share their story about how the Church has hurt them, and then someone else said, “Listen, I get it. But you need to remember a church is not the church! You shouldn’t ditch the necessity of church just because of a few bad apples.” Do you know the word for that? Dismissive. For the same reason, I’m exhausted by hearing “not all men are…

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